👋 Hello and welcome to the August edition of my blog.
I hope you are having a great summer. I actually prefer autumn and winter but I feel like that is something I need to whisper when the summer people are around! I am waiting patiently with my cosy lamps, candles and fairy lights. But don't tell anyone 🤫.
I wanted to share with you some personal experiences of compassionate leadership, that have stayed with me.
I may also write about quite opposite experiences at some point, but I wanted to highlight the impact of some of these (seemingly) small but actually mighty acts. As a Clinical Psychologist, the work can be emotionally challenging so these acts of compassion felt particularly soothing in difficult times.
❓Can you notice what they all have in common? Let me know your answers!
❤️1.) Having a mail tray with my name on, on my first day. I knew I had been thought about and this actually made me feel so welcome. So for the cost of a single sticker, the impact can be HUGE. This was around 12 years ago and I still remember this.
❤️2.) Recognising I was under academic pressure during my training and affording me time to complete an assignment. This is more about attunement and flexibility, rather than any notion of ‘time off’. It is knowing your employee well enough to understand what might be going on for them, and then taking action to ease pressure and make that situation better for them. Compassion in action.
❤️3.) Offering me a true safe space on a very difficult working day. I was highly stressed and upset. Inviting me into her office, and ignoring all her distractions (phone/email/people knocking on door) to listen to me. This act of listening (high quality listening) has also truly stayed with me 10+ years on. I have also experienced the opposite when a manager routinely answered their phone while I was in a meeting with them. Those interactions never felt safe, as I always felt like they did not have time for me.
❤️4.) Wait for it….. thanking me and acknowledging a particular piece of work. I think this never done enough. We are so wired to ‘fix mistakes’ or point out the negative, especially in fast paced and stressed environments. Taking a few seconds to offer a sincere thanks or acknowledgement is incredibly impactful. One thing I have noticed over the years is that when colleagues have received thank you cards (often from clients), they have displayed and kept them for years. When we receive gratitude, we are so inspired to do more of that. Of course we want praise as a reward. It is entirely normal to desire and enjoy praise from others. I understand it is not easy for everyone to receive praise (especially when there is a trauma history), but we can actually ask people HOW they would prefer to receive praise.
❤️5.) Being REALLY patient when I was learning, and making it safe to make mistakes. One leader I had always made me feel like my pace was okay, no matter what. He offered such constructive feedback in a really compassionate way. I was often observed conducting assessments, and he always made this process feel manageable. He also treated everyone equally, and was incredible with clients, too. A real example of someone who is in the perfect job!
❓Does any of this resonate? What can you action today, to offer compassion to a colleague? I am a firm believer in very small changes having the potential to have a huge impact.
🙏 I so appreciate you stopping by and reading.
I never take it for granted, and I appreciate every one of you.
Thanks and take care,
Elaine
While you are here, I wanted to tell you about my upcoming event - Creating Compassionate Workplaces: 30 Minute Makeover.
It is FREE, and you can sign up here: https://www.linkedin.com/events/compassionateleadership-30minut7226665394894180352/
Do you want to invest in compassionate leadership in your organisation? Do you want online training for your employees, with the option of a live follow up session? I also have a 7 Day Access available for in house training or away days. Sometimes you need to take action now, and start making that impact straightaway.
You can sign up and use the course immediately:
If you have any questions, we can arrange a 15 minute call. Just message me on LinkedIn.
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